Thursday, March 1

ramblings from a mama of THREE

these are just random thoughts i have been jotting down this past week. a totally wonky list of things going through this crazy postpartum mind of mine.

thank you all SO much for your sweet words, congratulations, and welcoming of our story kate into the world. she is more wonderful than my fingers can type into words and i don't remember what life was like without her. which is seriously weird but seriously true. 


i am so thankful i was able to sleep in the birthing center. with both the boys i could not fall asleep to save my life. this time around? i slept when story slept the entire time, and sent her off with the nurses at night and they brought her back when she was ready to eat. best decision of my life. i left the birthing center feeling somewhat refreshed. and we stayed at extra night longer than we had with foster. another runner up for the best decision of my life. it was like a little mini vacay for caleb and i. the boys were well cared for by my parents and sister and we slept, loved our sweet girl, took advantage of the nurse button, and ate more crushed ice than anyone ever thought possible.


speaking of crushed ice. i can't stop thinking about it. you know, i did send my husband to write down the name of the ice machine in the birthing center. it's called scotsman. don't worry, i googled it so you all don't have to. i told caleb that my life would be SO much better, i would be SO happy if i could have an ice machine like that. (i need help). my birthday is coming up you know. i prefer the "nugget ice" maker, puhlease. these machines are crazy expensive. like… the cheapest one… is $2,000 or something insane like that. NOT gonna work for me. so i have been frantically searching amazon, like the crazy woman i am, trying to find an ice maker that will create "chewy, nugget-like ice." ummm... can someone help a sister out? who else has one of these machines? no one? is that crickets i hear? if you specialize in ice makers and can help me i will kiss you on the mouth.


our first night home was redic. we felt so good from the two nights at the hospital that we're all we got this. story was, like any three day old baby, up all night and slept all day. in my deliriousness i fell asleep while she was nursing and knocked over my gigantic cup (the one i stole from the hospital) full of lemony icey water, ALL over our bed, my husband, and myself. it sort of puddled up and somehow covered our entire bed, bedding, and bodies. of course, at 2 am, i can't think of where extra sheets are, so we slept on our mattress with random quilts and blankets thrown over us. well, we didn't really even sleep. it was a joke.


i have to keep reminding myself that i will really start trying to get into a swing of a schedule (eat, wake, sleep) with story around 2 weeks old. i want to do it already but she is so sleepy being only a few days old. reality check, danielle. reality check. so, i am just a walking zombie right now. take nothing i say to heart. but, this much i know is true: there is a light at the end of the tunnel. remind me of this often, friends. remind me of this often.

i am working on writing out story's birth story. i am so excited to share it with you all.

story was born on friday morning at 2:19 am and we were discharged on sunday, so her first appointment with her pediatrician was monday. she was up 4 oz from the day before! yeehaw! and no jaundice. so we don't have to go back for one month. so crazy. i feel like i was at the pediatrician 20x the first week of brody and foster's lives. perspective.

can someone please point in the direction of nursing bras that come in bigger cup sizes than target offers?  and that don't cost $80 each? thankyouverymuch.

i'd also like to say that i am so much more hungry and have so many more cravings when nursing rather than when pregnant. does anyone else feel this way?

feed me. my boobs hurt.


the thing about being a mom of three, for me, is right now i have no choice that life must go on. i mean, i didn't have a choice after brody was born but it felt like i did. i had no other little people around me. just me and him. and it was so hard. the motivation was hard. the emotions were hard. the doing anything was hard. right now i feel forced almost into laundry, dishes, kicking the soccer ball, conversing about life with a 2 and almost 4 year old. it makes it harder in a way, and easier in a way. do you know what i mean or am i not making sense what-so-ever? i am thankful today for the have to. although if you ask me next week, or tomorrow, if i am thankful for all i have to do my answer may change drastically.

note to self: one day at a time.

46 comments:

  1. yep - one day at a time. even though julia is only three months old now, the first week seems like forever ago. :) and if you find where to buy a (much cheaper) ice machine please let me know! i would LOVE to have one too.

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  2. aww, she's a sweetie!
    thank goodness for those nights at the birthing center--and God be with you for these beginning days of newborn at home stuff. <3

    btw, danielle, that yellow cable knit hat she's wearing: i wondered if you bought it? if so, where? or if someone made it for her?? i think it's awesome and want to make one like it. lol.

    much love!! <3

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    1. hi beka! my mom bought the hat for story :) here's the link:

      http://www.etsy.com/listing/70288391/ready-to-ship-practical-bonnet

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  3. ahhhhh i love hearing your thoughts through this beautiful journey! so encouraging!!

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  4. she is so beautiful.
    and hello you've got this! you were made for this.
    b.t.dubbs. when i was nursing i was ravenous. the.whole.time.
    xxO

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  5. Motherhood Maternity had some pretty nice ones that were not crazy expensive...so maybe try that? I loved the stretchy ones that sort of looked like training bras or something..haha. Having a new baby is such a great feeling, because that newness fades so quickly! Congrats again, can't wait to hear the birth story!

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  6. First of all, I love the yellow hat Story is wearing! Did you make that? If you purchased it, where did you get it? Next, concerning the ice, I'm not sure if this is the ice you're talking about but when I hear you describe it, it sounds like Sonic ice to me. If you have a Sonic restaurant/drive in near you, they sell their ice by the bag! My stepmom lived off of it for awhile before we realized she had an iron deficiency. Hope that helps!! I'm so glad to hear you are all doing well. Sweet Story is beautiful. Can't wait for the birth story!

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    1. Yes, you're right about Sonic. So good!

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    2. thank you so much!

      here's the link for the hat:
      http://www.etsy.com/listing/70288391/ready-to-ship-practical-bonnet

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    3. i so wish we had a sonic! but the closest is about 3 hours away. so sad. :(

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  7. praying for you and your adjustment to life with three little ones. :) God's grace is sufficient!

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  8. She is so lovely!
    Nursing bras...my favorite was the one Nordstrom carried, but yeah it's $80...JC Penny has nice ones, too. You must order them from the catalog, you can ship to the store for free....the Medela brand is good. Good luck!

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  9. love it. and sometimes you just gotta pay a lot of money for a good bra. i know all about that. remember my boobs? they were like 5 gallon buckets on each side! thank the LORD i was able to have a reduction. but seriously you will feel so much better with a really great nursing bra, your back, your neck, your confidence, everything. if u keep asking, i am sure one will magically appear for you. for real! cant wait to see a lot more pics of her!

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  10. I felt that way as well, as soon as she latched on, I was starving and thirsting for something! Check Here for nursing bras. It is where I got all mine and they have a lot of sales:
    http://www.motherhood.com/maternity/nursing-bras.asp

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  11. she is absolutely beautiful, danielle. and you're absolutely right: just take one day at a time. HE is with you. :) love you!

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  12. Danielle, love hearing about your new life with 3! i'm not a mom so i don't know what it's like and what exactly your going through, but i've always been told to "enjoy these times" because it only happens once (per child). Also, i work part time at Victoria Secret. We don't have maternity bras, but we do have open clasp brans that are comfy, somewhat stretchy and have a cushioned underwire. They're called the Incredible. They are around $48. Hope this helps :)

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  13. pretty sure i wrote this exact same post like a month ago. i have a three year old, two year old and a 6 week old and totally feel you on the instantly wanting to be in a routine. perhaps i read babywise one too many times???? also, what is up with the hunger? i don't remember being this hungry before? i tell myself about 100 times a day that, "this too shall pass." they aren't always this gassy, or hungry, or fussy. good luck with the nursing bras...i opted for camis this time around from motherhood.

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  14. oh, and one more thing...sonic has that ice and you can buy it in a big bag. much cheaper than an ice machine.

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  15. Even though it may seem a bit crazy right now especially in your current zombie brain: you totally got this!

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  16. beautiful! congrats! love crushed ice, my favorite ever!

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  17. i was hungry all the time when i was nursing. and craving things waaayyy more when i was nursing. it was nuts. i would check jcpenny or sears for nursing bras. i found a couple good ones for around $30 when i was pregnant w/ my daughter a couple years ago.

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  18. she's beautiful! having my second child was so hard for me. i felt totally exhuasted and like i was going to lose my mind.

    my advice is sleep, sleep, sleep--whenever you get the chance!

    take care, ~tiff

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  19. oh girl! you are gonna get through this. one hour at a time. i was right where you were a year and a half ago. an almost 2 year old. an almost 4 year old and a brand new one. i was a hot mess. my dad had passed away 7 days before my littlest, Breyker, was born and i really didn't think i would make it out of those first few weeks. but i did! and every day gets easier. still. so happy for you and your sweet and beautiful girl! i seriously look back and can't imagine HOW i made it through and that's why i know it was just by the GRACE of GOD and that's how you'll get through it too.
    and as for the ice. i call it poop ice. and its the most amazing thing ever. and if you find a machine to make it for you. please tell me how.

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  20. xoxoxoxoxo you are amazing!! yes, i loved my time in the hospital more and more with each baby...mini vacay, yep. i got my bras at motherhood (i think it has a new name now, at colonie center...i think they were $20-30). yes, i was ravenous after giving birth...for weeks! i ate baskets of muffins from lindsay's :) and yes, there is a light...this too shall pass. you will be sleep deprived and delirious, but you have to keep going for the older ones, and it does make things better, and worse. in a few weeks, the schedule will be there and life will have a new normal feel. in the meantime, i'm here...to take your boys, to buy you bras, to bring you muffins...just say the word! that's one thing big thing i'm learning - to ask for help (one of the hardest things EVER for me!) love you!!!!

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  21. I'm so happy she's here! Can't wait to hear the story. Good luck with the ice machine- and Motherhood Maternity carries awesome nursing bras & they are usually on sale or buy one get one. Enjoy that little nugget!

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  22. Congrats she is BEAUTIFUL!

    I also get way more cravings when nursing. After my second it was Breyers Mint Choc Chip ice cream. My husband would come home from work and be amazed the half gallon he bought me the night before was gone. Yum.

    Also, I have struggled my whole life with bras!! I finally came to the realization that I can not buy a bra at Walmart, or Target, or anywhere but usually online. And that they cost between $60-80. When I was nursing I tried a couple cheaper bras and couldn't stand them. They didn't fit this 34 DDD (or maybe even a cup size bigger, whatever that is E? Yikes I dont even like saying that outloud). I usually wore my normal bra and got really good at the one handed unclipping in the back. This time around I am gonna fork out the money and get a good nursing bra. It will prob be at least 60 bucks but I think it's well worth it for the girl's sake....Good luck. If you find anything amazing let me know!

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  23. oh dear sweet Danielle...i have been where you are...just about 6.5 years ago. i haven't forgotten those tired days and blurry evenings, even though for most of it i was in a fog. if people offer to help you, take the help!! seriously!
    you will only have Story this little for so little time. enjoy it as best you can.
    schedules will come later. your boys will not hate you for not being with them 24/7. and yes, one day at a time...sometimes one hour at a time! hugs and prayers to you my friend!

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  24. Oh, congratulations on your sweet little bundle! It's funny, when I had my third boy I switched my google status thingie to "one foot in front of the other". It's another translation of "one day at a time". haven't you heard?

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  25. This is WONDERFUL! and you are right... one day at a time... I love that nugget ice too. I ALWAYS love the Zaxby's ice..mmm.

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  26. oh, congratulations on your sweet little bundle. funny...when I had my third sun I changed my google status thingie to "one foot in front of the other". it's another translation of "one day at a time". haven't you heard?

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  27. Congrats on a beautiful girl:) Diapers.com has good nursing bras that aren't supper expensive and that come in bigger cup sizes. If you spend 49$ you get free 2 day shipping, also free returns. What i did was buy three different bras to see what i would like, qualify for free shipping and returned for free the bras i didn't like! Good luck momma!

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  28. take deep breaths sweet momma. exhale. inhale. soak up the moments. you are so incredibly blessed with three beautiful children. pour your love into them and make memories.

    love & light your way.
    xo.

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  29. amen. one day at a time!
    beautiful, sweet story girl.
    can't wait to hear the birth story, praise jesus!
    praying and praying for you.
    rest and no more hurting boobs:)
    also, i hate bras. so praying for that too. obviously:)


    and i LOVE you. xo

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  30. congrats, she is beautiful.
    those newborn days (and toddler days) are exhausting but when they are gone, a mammas heart and body will ache for that tiny baby touch. soak it in.
    No info on ice machine but you can get a giant bag of ice pellets at Sonic for like $2.
    prayers for you all

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  31. Um... we have a lot in common. My name is Danielle too, and I am also completely obsessed with our birthing center's ice. AMAZING! As for the bras, I get mine at Motherhood and I think they were right around $20. Not bad and I wore the same three for like 2 years straight. Congratulations on your sweet Story Kate!

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  32. i love your new mommy ramblings. and that baby! lordy, she is beautiful! also, gemma is 9 months old and i'm still nursing and still has hungry as ever!!!!

    xoxo - you can do all things, (even the crazy delirious late night shenanigan things) thru HIS strength!!

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  33. Lord, may your grace be ENOUGH for danielle and all other members of that house right now! cover them with peace, patience, and love for one another. bring your healing to danielle's body and nourishment to baby story. Lord, open danielle's eyes to the moment by moment priorities, and protect her from being overwhelmed. your agenda is good and acceptable for her, and let her fix her eyes on You. we thank you Jesus for this new life and all you will do through her! in Your name alone I pray, amen. *loves to you danielle!!*

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  34. Oh my word she is so precious! It feels like forever since I was in that hospital room with the ice chips, nurses and a crying baby. But there is grace for each situation/step along the path of life. I hope you can feel all of our prayers for you right now. Before you know it she'll be running around and potty training.
    Praying for rest and a new normal to come upon your home.
    Much love from downstate xo

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  35. I have always loved your stories. . .congratulations on your gorgeous family!

    When I was nursing and need an extra bra, I bought some comfy cotton wireless regular bras in a size (or two) up, and just pulled the cups down to nurse. Kind of ruins the bra in the long run, but works great when you are at home and don't have to have the detachable cup. Hope that helps, and hope you get some rest!

    ~~ hugs ~~ Molly

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  36. I have always loved reading your stories! Congratulations on your gorgeous family.

    When I was nursing, I bought some not too expensive cotton wireless bras in a size or two up, and just pulled the cups down to nurse. Works fine when you are home and don't have to have the detachable cups. They won't last forever when you use them like that, but they are very comfy. Hope that helps! and hope you get some rest

    ~~hugs~~ Molly

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  37. just so excited for you. what a sweet precious nugget of love.
    3 kids is a circus and feels overwhelming sometimes but gets easier and easier everyday. :)

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  38. y'all. we have no sonic. isn't that awful?

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