i waited til this morning to write this because if i wrote it on saturday night i would have written it with tears flowing and gnashing of teeth. now, i can look back and sigh. maybe even half-heartedly smile, when saturday i could hardly see straight.
it was a hard mom day for me. every day is a mom day because it's the never ending career but, some days are a lot harder than others. we're still transitioning into some sort kind of normalcy between moving in, new surroundings, fighting sicknesses and sharing a bedroom. the boys are waking up earlier because brody has been promptly shouting i'm ready to get up mom! at 6:00 when they both are usually 7:30ish risers. it is a rough way to start the day because i go into it knowing that it will probably be all downhill from here. the overtired, runny nose, teething baby is not easy to entertain.
i don't remember all the details as to how my boys spiraled into these sweating, screaming crying, wanting to be held masses. but, i do remember that my boys spiraled into these sweating, screaming crying, wanting to be held masses.
i was trying to juggle holding both of them, prevent their heads from crashing together and maintain my cool, all at once. it was a long time of this. a long of enough time that my head hurt so bad that i wanted to throw up. a long enough time time that my vision was spotted. a long enough time that i called caleb to tell him i really don't like that he has to work saturdays and i really needed him here.
i was quick to become angry at the fact i was alone with two miserable kids. all my friend's husbands were home with them. i was quick to be become angry that foster prevented brody from napping, quick to become angry at brody pushing foster off my lap. he needed me, too.
take a step back, danielle.