(don't read this if you have yet to read the book)
i liked the book the whole time i was reading it. i looked forward to the thirty minutes or so we, the book and i, would spend together before bed. i wasn't engrossed though. i kept waiting for a life changing event and it wasn't happening. i did love the the night wilson planned for his 30th anniversary with his wife, jane. it was very special but it didn't seem that crazygood (is crazygood a word?).
so, needless to say, i was incredibly shocked as i read page 253. itty bitty goosebumps appeared all over my arms and i got a serious case of the chills as i realized what was happening. at first, i didn't feel like there was an inkling of the smallest hint that this was what was going to take place. i had no idea, but now the whole book made much more sense. in fact, i'd like to read it all over again, taking in the details more, now that i know the ending. i do remember, towards the end, that wilson asked jane if she would marry him all over again and the nerves that surrounded that question. i was suspicious about the "item", in the trunk of his daughter's car, he had to bring over to the house the day of the wedding. i was thinking it might be an heirloom they would incorporate into the wedding from their mother's own wedding day. clearly, not the case.
from the epilogue:
"i learned, for instance, that while wounds can be inflicted easily upon those we love, it's often much more difficult to heal them. yet the process of healing those wounds provided the richest experience of my life, leading me to believe that while i've often overestimated what i could accomplish in a day, i had underestimated what i could in a year."
it all brings to mind a quote i love from c.s. lewis, the four loves:
“to love at all is to be vulnerable. love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. if you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. but in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. it will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. to love is to be vulnerable.”
ps: i didn't like one bit of the swan actually "being" allie. i mean, come on. the swan is not allie. i wish we could omit this part from the book. seriously.